What I learned from Maxwell

Maxwell is hands down one of my favorite artists. Easily. I’ve been listening to this man for over 20 years and this past Thursday, I made that realization as I sat at his concert here in Little Rock. Just watching this amazingly charismatic man so comfortable in his own skin rock it out on stage was magickal.

It  made me think about all the reasons that I appreciate Maxwell so much - especially since I’ve been fortunate to see him in concert now twice :-D. My favorite crooner has some awesome life lessons for you if you pay attention ;-).

In reflecting, I believe the number one lesson he offers by example is this: Be comfortable in your own skin at all costs.

Happy Me at the concert!

Each time I’ve seen Maxwell, he has been his quirky, slightly goofy, dancing crazily but with abandonment self on stage. It’s like he is having the time of his life engaging with us and we just happen to be watching. Pay attention to that statement. He is FULLY engaged with the crowd - totally into them - but not at all concerned whether they are digging him or thinking he is a nutter butter. It’s like he is in his own little world that we are in too. It’s really an amazing thing to behold and be a part of.

I wonder if he learned this early on in his career after his first round of black college tours opening for the Fugees - or if he always had it. Taking you back a bit in my own history, I remember when he came through town during Howard’s Homecoming. People booed him right off the stage. I mean vehemently booed him. I think someone might have even thrown something. It was horrible (and embarrassing to me as a Howardite that we’d act that way!).

I wonder if experiencing something like that multiple times (sadly ours was not the only campus that booed him) created within him a resolve to enjoy who *he* was no matter what and at all costs.

I ask this because Maxwell has not changed. The same bubbly, quirky dude that was on stage back when I was 20 something is the same one that was on stage this past week - just happy to be himself, happy to be doing something he loved, happy to be in that moment with us. Yes, his look has changed (as mine has from the hippy, witchy granola, engineering/viola-playing, hip-hop flowerchild that I was in my early 20s) as he’s grown up and evolved, but his essential essence is very much the same. And that my friends, I can only imagine is no small feat in his industry.

So that, in addition to the pure awesomeness of Maxwell in concert, is what I took away from my experience last Thursday.

The gist is this: You are going to have haters and naysayers. You might have some people that try to push you right out the door with shame and ridicule for what you are trying to do and who you even are at your very core.

The bottom line is that you can’t let it stop you dear. Yes, you can rest. You can recoup. You can even lament (I remember that there was a time when everything was angsty with Maxwell). But past that, you must keep it moving. Your world depends on it and what’s even more magickal is that *THE* world depends on it.

Just like Maxwell inviting us into his world but not being too concerned about whether we liked it or not created this wonderful over 20-year career of his, welcoming others into your world by being unapologetically yourself BUT not really giving too many cares about what someone thinks about it - that’s the difference maker between 20 years of continued, growing awesomeness...and 20 years of misery- pointe blanke. And 20 years of you living in your awesomeness instead of your misery - imagine what kind of ripple effect that would have on the world?

Which one are you going to choose?

Maxwell Concert, Little Rock, Ar

Beauty Rituals as Self Care?

Just recently I was asked to be a guest on my mentor’s podcast. The topic was what I do and why I do it. That should have been easy right?

I felt some anxiety though.

Was there a way to talk about all the components of what I do in a way that the listeners could easily see the beautiful synergy? Was there a way to make my philosophy, mission, and offerings succinct and complete and understandable? Maybe even inspiring?

As I began talking though, the fear around that worry completely dissipated.

I know that all the components of what I do equal total transformation and I understood even more clearly how to explain how I’ve come to my conclusions. The guidance I give is a true and doable path to thriving in life (not just getting by).

WHAT DID WE TALK ABOUT?

We mostly talked about beauty rituals and why they are an ultimate form of self care.

There were so many gems in that conversation and truly it’s too much to write about in one post; so be on the lookout for future posts where I expound and wax philosophical about the things our conversation brought up.

However, let’s start today here at the beginning and explore the emotional charge that comes up when you say or hear “beauty rituals are an ultimate form of self care”. Did you feel the charge? I know I still feel it.

Where does your mind automatically go?

My mind defaults to judgement. If you do too let’s look deeper into that judgement and define it even further. Is there a sense of frivolousness, shallowness, baseness, simple-mindedness (and not in a good way) when you think about engaging in beauty rituals with this intent? Does it feel like you’re cheating yourself out of some possible evolution/enlightenment - taking the easy way out or dumbing it down for yourself?

Maybe you are the one that is on the other side of this - feeling like you dare not indulge yourself that way. You find yourself feeling like it would supremely selfish to take the time to care for yourself, especially through pampering and activities solely created to enhance your beauty and make you feel good..

And of course, there are those of us that are somewhere in between.

There’s so much resistance around this right? Which means there’s so much room for growth. There’s so much room to find your sweet spot. There’s such a potential to make a big statement to yourself and thereby to the universe that you matter enough to be a priority.

How awesome would that be?

Let’s actually look at that. How awesome would it be to proclaim you are a priority. Not to ask *if* you are a priority. But to proclaim it and bask in it and live in it as a quiet, powerful, steadying truth?

How would that affect your life?

How would that change what you allowed yourself to accept from people. How would that change how you interacted with everyone from your coworker to the delivery guy? How strongly would that put you in a place of no longer reacting on auto-pilot, being swayed by random, unchecked emotions and energetic whims from others.

Wow, that sounds like a life on purpose right? That sounds like a life where you could actually have some say-so in the joy you feel and -wait for it- even in the experiences that you get to have.

The beginning of a life like that CAN start simply - and it can start simply with a few beauty rituals that you partake in with intent. You can move the needle and start churning the wheels in your favor with just a few tiny but meaningful shifts. It really can be easy. It doesn’t have to be an ordeal and you don’t have to feel like you must change drastically in an instant in order for your change to be valid.

What it’s really about is taking one small, meaningful action and then another and another until those become commonplace. All of a sudden, you’ll be living a life infused with all the things that you want instead of most of what you don’t want.

If you’d like help figuring out what your first small meaningful action should be, I’m your woman. Let’s hop on the phone for a complimentary “Get on Track” session and I’ll help you choose a self care beauty ritual guaranteed to jumpstart your transformation. Click here to see my schedule and choose a time that's best for you. 

Free Teleseminar! - Self Care for Busy Women

Hey dear!

Have you seen my announcement around on social media about the free teleseminar I’m giving this Thursday? I’m really looking forward to it and I don’t think you should miss it. I’m going to be sharing 3 ways to reel yourself back in from stress, worry, and the dreaded A word – anxiety. The point is to show you how I get my balance back and encourage you to try out some of my tactics for yourself.

As you probably know by now, I am a fellow busy woman. Even though I’ve made a huge effort over the past 12 months to release that identity, it still creeps up from time to time. I constantly teeter the balancing edge of knowing that I must be a Firestarter and remembering that the flames can’t spark off if I have no fuel to give them. I’ve struggled with making time to replenish myself for years. Only because of my stripped-bare year, have I catapulted into enough of a sense that I must preserve myself to be able to do that with a disinterested shrug and oh well to the rest of my supposed to-do list. As I’ve said a couple of times, I was ready to let it all go if need be.

And that was not a particularly fun time, so if I can help keep you from having to take yourself to that brink, I’m all for it. This is why my focus is on self-care for the beginning of this year and why I’ve decided to offer this free teleseminar.

Registering for it is simple – all you need to do is text selfcare to 87365. That will get you set up so that the day before, you’ll receive a text with all of the listening details and a reminder text the day of to tune in.

I really hope you will join me. You won’t regret it and in fact you’ll feel so extra rejuvenated and refreshed because you did :-). 

Remember, registering is simple - just text selfcare to 87365!

Vision Boards are Self Care

I’ve been on the vision board band wagon for a much longer time than most. Back in 2006 when the Secret first came out, I was introduced to the idea of the law of attraction, the law of abundance, and the fact that thoughts become things.

Just like everyone else, I got excited about ‘how easy’ it would be to create the life I wanted now that I knew the Secret. And just like everyone else, I quickly realized that though the Secret was absolute truth, getting my mind to cooperate fully was a journey of layers and layers of uncovering – and not as easy as I naively thought it would be :-).

The pure essence of the truth that feelings attract like feelings (and therefore the things that are associated with triggering those feelings) is simple, complex, and profound. Sometimes our brains need an equally seemingly simple yet complex and profound way to harness that truth. This is what vision boards are.

A vision board creates a gateway to feelings we want to have by placing the things you associate with those feelings in plain sight, jazzed up in a way that delights on its own. Its whole purpose is to ignite what it feels like having this or that thing. In that way, you create the energetic pull that brings that thing out of ‘maybe’ into reality. It really is that simple.

However, it does create a chicken/egg type of conundrum. Does the elatedness come first and then the thing? Does the thought of the thing coming cause the elatedness? Must you get ridiculously and randomly happy first and then start making your orders of the Universe?

In my experience, these are the thoughts that can potentially kill the entire experience. Within these thoughts are doubt, judgement, and fear – all negative feelings that move you away from an intrinsic appreciation of the activity itself. Vision Boards don’t have to be about the outcome and in their essence aren’t about ‘doing it right’. That stress is unwanted and counter-productive. Instead I’ve come to realize that vision boards are much more about ‘doing right by yourself’ and taking a massive step forward in your own self care.

This is what I mean. When you set aside time to create a vision board, this is what you are saying:

1.       you are firstly affirming to yourself that you are important enough to make time for and to plan for.

2.       You are affirming that you have goals and desires that are important.

3.       You are affirming that you believe enough in yourself that these are worth thinking about in a positive way.

4.       You are putting a concrete belief forward that your future could be brighter and more fulfilling than your present.

This is radical self care. This is what self care really is – the supporting of yourself in a way that reminds you constantly that you are worthy, important, and favored by the Universe.

This is why creating a Vision Board can be a very powerful form of self care, especially when you create it with a conscious awareness of the intentions you are setting in place – not just for the things that you want to see manifest – but also for the way you see and care for yourself.

There are many reasons to decide to make the time to create a Vision Board - when you need a reboot and a rebalance, when you need to remember the possibilities in life, when you need to refocus yourself and employ the three Rs – refreshment, renewal, rejuvenation. One of the most impactful reasons to be conscious of though is to remember your own worth and light! <3!

I'll be hosting the first ever CREATE YOUR LIFE VISION BOARD Workshop on March 13th from 9am - 1pm. If you are ready to step forward and claim a vision for your life, I invite you to watch the video below where I tell you all about it and visit here to register!

The Link between Reproductive Health and Your 2nd Chakra

Initially, when we think of our reproductive system health, the idea that it might have anything at all to do with our level of fulfillment in life may seem a far fetch. However, stay with me for a bit and I’ll explain the connection.

In the world of energy work, your reproductive system is in the area of your 2nd Chakra. If you aren’t familiar with Chakras, you can think of them as energy centers in your body that have influence over various aspects of your emotions, actions, and life in general. The 2nd Chakra has to do with your creativity, passions, and sexuality – the things that inspire you and give you a zest for life.

So when your 2nd Chakra is balanced, you are generally fully in touch with your creativity and your passions and your ability to do great work is maximized. This intact inspirational energy is vital to living a vibrant and fulfilled life.

When this Chakra is out of balance however, doubts creep in and we begin living a diminished version of ourselves. This can translate into not voicing our opinions, stifling our anger or frustration, and leaving emotions pent up and unexpressed.

Of course, this doesn’t serve anyone, least of all ourselves. When we are living in this diminished state, our contributions to the world are suppressed and watered down. We can find ourselves feeling as though we aren’t cut out for handling the strains and stressors of life positively and as if that weren’t enough, these issues can begin to manifest on a physical level as well. 

This is where the connection to reproductive system health comes into play.

On the physical plane, these issues of stifled creativity and expression show up as ailments like debilitating PMS and cramps, fibroids, endometriosis, and PCOS.

One way to see all of these problems is as ways that your body is showing you how much you are stifling and suppressing yourself. They give you a great opportunity to explore where you need to process old feelings, resolve old hurts, and muster the courage to live more on your own terms.

Think about this – when we experience reproductive health issues, most all of them slow us down and require us to ‘be still and present’. I know for myself, when my period cramps are raging, all I have energy to do is to sit or lie down. I come to an almost meditative state where there is little space for much else other than thinking and allowing.

Within this state, I experience so much peace and clarity. I'm able to see clearly where I'm holding myself back and where I need to actually take a step back. It's one of the many gifts that this time brings.

The next time that you experience this, take it as an opportunity to do some meditative journaling about where you are holding yourself in. Ask yourself how you might be allowing your creativity and expression to be silenced.

Here are a few questions to help you in the process of discovering where the imbalances lie and how to begin righting them.

1.       What creative activity did I love to do as a child? Why haven’t I done it lately? What’s stopping me?

2.       What haven’t I told someone that I’ve wanted to tell someone?

3.       What idea haven’t I acted on because it’s scary and I don’t think I can do it?

Start off with these questions and let them carry you to your answers and then make a promise to yourself to act on them.

Understanding the links your reproductive system has to your ultimate happiness is a great gift. It is connected to so many concerns that are important to us as women - from having clear skin to our sense of well being. Beyond what I've talked about here, there is much more to healing your reproductive system and having it function optimally. An in-depth look at your hormones and how well-balanced they are will tell you a lot. Out of whack hormones can cause all types of ailments and inconveniences including the most common ones stated above, PCOS, fibroids, early menopause, etc. 

If you find yourself dealing with hormonal imbalances (telltale signs are monthly breakouts that don't respond to treatment, hair loss or hair gain, painful periods), I invite you to download my new Ebook Back to Balance: Hormonal Health by entering your email address below! It will teach you simple mental and physical adjustments you can make right now to begin balancing your hormones and experiencing true relief! 

Enter your email address to receive your Ebook!

Self Care for Busy Women: 90 Days to Restoring Your Spirit!

Hello love!

Happy Valentine's Day! It's so interesting the way the Universe and serendipity works. Interesting isn't the right word - it's magical and awe-inspiring. Because I believe in serendipity, serendipity happens around me all of the time. And so the serendipity of my plans to write this message ending me on sending this message on Valentine's Day - how appropriate :-). 

Today I want to tell you about the new offerings I've put together. I've thought about what's been the most needed thing I've been asked to teach (not just the most fun ;-)). What thing is it that people gravitate to me for and ask me about? What wisdom do I have to share that you ask me for time and time again.

I've discovered two and these are what I've decided to lead with this year.

One is Hormonal Health which I call Wise Woman Womb Ways. I've found that so many women are at a loss about how to be in balance with their body after a certain age. It's something I've practiced for years - I know my body really well and I'm tuned in to what it needs and most of the time, I'm good at complying. This is what keeps my skin clear, gives me boundless energy to do so much and choose to do only what I want, and keeps me - as a friend just recently told me -  "the most gorgeous, vivacious, fit, healthy and young spirited 40 year old I know".  Am I blushing?? You know I am :-D. 

And so I've created as a starting point for you, my guide to Wise Woman Hormonal Health. It's free and I made it out of love and real care about helping you set out on the right path if you are floundering looking for direction. Please tap in and download it here.

The second area is self care. Oh self care. Self care is more than a simple word for me. It's what has saved my life. Yes, I know that at first glance, sounds melodramatic. But rest assured, it is the honest truth. Had I not learned to care for myself, prioritize myself, learn myself, and ultimately love myself - I would not be here. I mean that literally. You may know my story of depression and attempted suicide. Believe me when I say that no one else can convince you that life is worth living except yourself. To get out of that space YOU have to decide that it's worth it and that you are worth it. 

And so you see, self care is sacred for me. I believe it is THE KEY to unlocking the rest of the joy in your life. And I believe that self care is more than just a massage or a mantra or an essential oil diffuser. It begins so much deeper than that. It's multi-faceted and spans across all the areas of your life. It's a practice much more than an act  - self care is a lifestyle.

And when I thought about what work I wanted to do this year that would fill me up and simultaneously fill up my clients and customers, empowering them to create self care plans that reached to their essence and restored their very core continued to float to the surface.

And so I listened and in response I created Self Care for Busy Women: 90 Days to Restoring Your Spirit (because part of our problem is that we are so busy right?). It's a 90 Day Program that brings together all that I have learned in the journey of becoming the most important person to me. This program does a lot. In the immediate, it frees you from dragging through every day in zombie mode. But more than that, I designed it help you discover how to feel restored, renewed, and ultimately truly able to handle all that life presents you - with ease, grace, joy, and a knowing that things are always working out in your favor. Because they always are and wouldn't it be nice to just have peace with knowing that's true?

I'll be honest with you. This program is intensive and extensive. It's only for the woman that is ready for a change - a change that might take you through some unpleasant moments and make you look at some uncomfortable things. With love, I'm telling you that it's not for you yet if you find yourself creating excuses for your life. It's not quite yet for you if everything is always everyone else's fault. It's not for you if you are just looking for someone to commiserate with and agree on how bad it all is.

But if you know that your spirit needs restoring and you are ready to do the work - some of it hard, some of it fun and joy-filled, all of it necessary - then I would love to talk to you because I believe that Self Care for Busy Women might be what you are seeking. I want to talk with you and see if the program I've created is your next step of renewal on your path. 

I invite you to schedule a Rebalance Session with me where we'll take a look at some of the reasons that you feel like your wheels are spinning, create some solutions that you can immediately put into play and then assess if Self Care for Busy Women is a good match for you. Click here for my calendar - let's talk soon!